Danger! Steve Bytes

Every year I spend a several days at our local Comic-Con in an artist’s booth. I have nothing to do than sit and look pretty. This is when my creative side comes out.

But what I think are good ideas are usually met with cringe faces, and threats to be demoted to “customer”. Here is an unedited list of stickers idea I jotted down over a week at this year’s con.

Type 1 Diabetes/T1D Life

Someone I love has Type 1 Diabetes, an autoimmune disease that will affect them forever. I thought a series of T1D bumper stickers would help us to laugh, bring awareness, and help remove the stigma around it.

• T1D: The Pancreas has left the chat 
• T1D: My Pancreas has left the chat
• I Run on Insulin & Sarcasm
• Be Nice—My Pancreas Quit on Me
• T1D: Because My Immune System Loves Drama
• My Blood Sugar is Low—Proceed with Caution
• Diabetes: The Only Thing Sweet About Me
• Warning: May Bolus Before Coffee
• Pricking Myself Daily… And Not Even a Vampire
• I Have a Love/Hate Relationship with Carbs
• T1D: Challenge Accepted 
• Insulin: Because My Pancreas is on Permanent Vacation
• I Count Carbs Like Some People Count Calories
• Built Tough—Powered by Insulin
• Yes, I Can Eat That. No, It’s Not Your Business.
• Artificial Pancreas, Real Attitude
• Diabetes: The Ultimate Balancing Act
• Not Drunk, Just Low on Sugar
• Warning: Handle with Snacks
• T1D Life—One Prick at a Time
• My Pancreas is a Quitter, But I’m Not!
• Insulin: The Most Expensive Juice on the Market
• Doin’ Diabetes Like a Boss
• I Carb-Count Better Than Your Accountant
• Life’s a Rollercoaster—Especially My Blood Sugar
• My Pancreas is Broken, But My Sense of Humor Isn’t
• Diabetes: Because Life Needed More Plot Twists
• Low or High, I Still Fly!
• T1D — I’ve had more pricks than your mom
• T1D — I’ve still had less pricks than your mom

Autism spectrum disorder is a hot button topic for some conspiracy nuts in my life; they are firmly in the vaccine bad, vaccine causes autism crowd. When my pediatrician told my parents that Steve has “monkey blood”, that wasn’t an actual medical diagnosis; it was the best the doctor could do at the time because Autism and autism spectrum disorders wouldn’t be added to the DSM-V until the mid 2000’s. These autism and ADHD sticker ideas really resonate with me. These are for myself and others.

The Tism — Autism Life

• Excuse me while I stim a second
• Stim Happens
• Neurodiverse & Thriving
• Autistic and Awesome
• Sensory Overload Incoming!
• Socializing… Buffering… Please Wait
• I’m Not Rude, I’m Processing
• Routine is My Love Language
• Different, Not Less—Just Cooler
• Autism: My Superpower, Your Mystery
• Bright Minds Think Differently
• I Speak Fluent Special Interest
• Warning: Unexpected Loud Noises May Occur
• I Make Eye Contact on Special Occasions
• Masking Off, Brain On
• Team Autistic—We’re Uniquely Wired
• Love Me, Love My Sensory Needs
• Meltdown Mode: Please Stand By
• Not a Puzzle, Just a Person
• I Do Things My Way… and It Works!
• Autistic & Unapologetic
• Yes, I Have Autism. No, It’s Not Contagious.
• Eye Contact is Overrated
• The World Needs More Neurodivergence
• Autism: Because Normal is Overrated
• Vaccinated & Still Autistic—What a Plot Twist!
• Got My Shots, Still Got My Autism!
• Vaccines Didn’t Give Me Autism, But Thanks for the Credit!
• Autistic & Boosted—Fear Me!
• I Was Born This Way… No Syringe Required
• If Vaccines Cause Autism, I Want a Refund
• Fully Vaxxed, Still Quirky
• I had Autism before I got vaccinated.
• Autism: Powered by Genetics, Not Pfizer
• Blame My DNA, Not My Doctor
• I Got My Vaccines & All I Got Was This Awesome Brain
• Jabbed & Joyfully Neurodivergent
• Autism: It’s Not Just for the Vaccinated!
• Herd Immunity & Hyperfixations—That’s My Life
• Thanks, Vaccines! Now I Can Be Socially Awkward AND Disease-Free!
• Autism Runs in My Family—Not in a Syringe
• Fully Vaccinated, Still Can’t Read Social Cues
• Yes, I’m Vaccinated. No, I Won’t Infect You With Logic.
• Shots Fired (Into My Arm), Autism Unaffected!
• Vaccines Protect Everyone—Even Us Literal Thinkers
• Science Made Me Safe, Genetics Made Me Awesome
• I Got Vaccinated & All I Developed Was a Sense of Humor
• If Autism Was in a Shot, I’d Take a Booster!
• Vaccines Work. So Does My Hyperfocus.
• Vaxxed, Relaxed, & Socially Perplexed
• I’m Not an Experiment—Just a Walking Encyclopedia

ADHD 

• Easily Distracted, But Look—A Squirrel!
• ADHD: Fueling Productivity… at 2 AM
• Hold That Thought… Never Mind, It’s Gone
• Warning: May Start 10 Tasks, Finish None
• Yes, I Can Hyperfocus—Just Not on What I Should
• ADHD: Like a Browser with 47 Tabs Open
• I Wasn’t Listening, But That Sounds Cool
• Messy Desk, Brilliant Mind
• Impulsive? Me? Let’s Get a Puppy!
• ADHD: Because Multi-tasking is for Amateurs
• I Overthink, Overreact, and Overdo Everything
• My mom said I’m just fine.
• I may have ADHD, but as far as my grandma is concerned, I’m just a nut.
• ADHD & Coffee: A Dangerous Combination
• Fast Brain, Slow Executive Function
• Patience? Never Heard of It.
• ADHD: Where “One More Episode” Means Five
• I Have ADHD—What’s Your Superpower?
• ADHD Mode: All or Nothing, No In-Between
• Late Again? Blame Time Blindness
• I Came, I Saw… I Forgot What I Was Doing
• To-Do List? More Like a To-Don’t List
• I Can Hyperfocus… But Only on the Wrong Thing
• Yes, I Took My Meds. No, They Wore Off.
• I Lost My Train of Thought… Oh Look, a New One!
• My Brain is a Ping-Pong Match on Fast Forward
• ADHD: Making Life Interesting Since Fordever
• ADHD: because monkey blood is not an official diagnosis 
• My life is a collection of memes 

ADHD Meds

• ADHD Meds: Now With 10% More Focus!
• Yes, I Took My Meds—Why Do You Ask So Fast?!
• Caffeine & Meds: The Ultimate Power Combo
• ADHD Meds: Because “Just Try Harder” Didn’t Work
• If I Didn’t Take My Meds, You’d Know
• Meds Took Effect… What Was I Saying?
• Yes, I Have ADHD. No, My Meds Don’t Fix Everything.
• Medicated, Motivated, Still Distracted
• ADHD Meds: Turning “What Was I Doing?” Into “Oh Yeah!”
• If You Think I Talk Fast Now, You Should See Me Unmedicated
• Meds Help, But I Still Can’t Find My Keys
• Medicated & Still a Hot Mess—Just Faster!
• ADHD Meds: Making Me 10% More Likely to Finish a Task
• Warning: Meds May Wear Off Mid-Conversation
• On Meds? Functional. Off Meds? Chaos.
• Took My Meds, But My Brain Still Buffering…
• ADHD Meds: When Coffee Just Isn’t Enough
• I Took My Meds… But Did I Take My Meds?
• ADHD Meds: The Difference Between “Productive” and “Oops”
• Meds Don’t Cure ADHD, But They Do Keep Me Employed
• Medicated & Motivated… For About 4 Hours
• My ADHD Meds Work, But My Brain Didn’t Get the Memo
• Yes, I Took My Meds. No, I Won’t Organize Your Closet.
• ADHD Meds: Because “Sit Still” is a Lie
• Meds or No Meds—I’m Still Me, Just With Less Chaos

Mental health has always been a struggle for me, it goes along with the chemical imbalance and ADHD. If I couldn’t laugh at these, I cry.

Depression — Depressed Life 

• Riding the SSRI wave—smooth-ish sailing
• I run on SSRIs and spite
• Powered by serotonin (with a little pharmaceutical help)
• SSRIs: Because raw dogging life does’t work.
• SSRIs: Making me slightly less unbearable since [insert year]
• Mood stabilized, still questionable choices ahead
• Ask me about my selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (or don’t)
• Chemically balanced* (*Results may vary)
• SSRIs: Because my brain forgot how to serotonin
• Now with 20% more chill (thanks, SSRIs!)
• Sadness? Buffered. Joy? Also buffered.
• My emotions are on a slight delay—please hold.
• SSRIs: Because happiness shouldn’t be a DIY project
• Adjusting my serotonin like a radio dial
• Chemically enhanced, still a mess
• SSRIs: The closest thing to a software update for my brain.
• RFKjr can have my SSRIs when he pulls them from my cold dead hands.

None of this should be taken seriously, it is crap that I came up with while I was bored. If anyone wants to make any of these stickers, I’ll probably want to buy them.